Muses has come and gone. Another sensational experience. We had a lot of stops and starts along the way, and this was one of the longest ones I have ever skated – but still awesome! It was, however, the first year that more of my old friends did not skate than actually did. I was definitely feeling the absence of some of my friends: Trixie, Wit, Chess, VvD, BeAtch, Crusty, Lacy, Deb, Deuce, MILF, Sophie, SlayedHer, Cheap. I wish they could have been there but I was thrilled to see some of my old teammates: Slaughter (co-captain), Cougar, and Bea (not technically a Punch but we still regard her as one since she was one of our favorite subs). And the always delightful Cooney! I was also happy to see Vieux and Choke; while I never had the opportunity to skate with them they are two of my favorites of the “new” BERG.
The parade started without any major hitches. Got there on time and in place. Lovely weather. I got a good stretch at Ashley’s friend’s house.
Me and Ashley pre-wig, pre-stretch, pre-roller skates.
I got two shoes before the parade started (one from a friend and one from a trade).
Christi gave me my first shoe of the season!
I also got to see all of my favorite Elvi and they all had amazing throws for me. Thank you Paul, Scott, Joe, Matthew, and Frank. Every year it seems like they outdo their throws from the year before – and wow, do I respect that. Also two different Elvi gave me the coveted “all shook up” vibrators. Should I be flattered or… is my life that obvious? Ah, heck…
The Goddess that is Choke
My breasts have exhibited many interesting personalities when I’ve been on roller skates over the years. They have had flowers sprouting out of them, bullseyes to mark the shot, bubbles blowing out, and during this parade they spun. Sometimes I feel like I can never top my own boobs.
Skating on Magazine Street is always a warm up. Then you turn onto Napoleon Ave and the crowd dilates briefly where the police barriers are before swallowing you back up, and the streets become a bit rougher, the fans a bit more frantic, even the lighting changes. Once you hit St. Charles you know it’s ON and you just roll with it. I gave out beads, wheels, buttons, spears, and even some kisses for the enthusiastic who asked.
Here are some of my favorite moments of Muses 2012:
– Seeing all my friends on the route. Some I’d seen a few hours earlier, some it’d been way too long. But I was excited to see all of them – and wish I had just a few more moments with them.
– A Seattle rollergirl dressed to the pink nines was on the route with a bag full of swag to exchange for a wheel. I was happy to oblige and I got some sweet things: a skate tool (which I am giving to Trixie because I have two already), socks, laces, stickers and derby chocolate!
Derby Sister from Seattle!
– Telling Cougar that I was running low on throws and having her tell me (perfectly deadpan) “Oh, you should do what I do then. Only throw to Asian people.” I think I laughed for about six blocks. Later that night, the last few blocks, I saw about six young Asian girls (none older than five years old) all lined up. I turned around and handed them all something. So sweet and cute. Since we were at the end, and the truck was ahead of me, I was in no rush to catch up. I danced in the back and created my own little parade.
– During the breaks we had a lot of fans jump in and dance with us. One elderly gentleman was really flirting with all the ladies. And I loved seeing Cooney shake it down!
Ladies Man with Slaughter
– Seeing fans that I didn’t know I had. It’s a bit weird (and somewhat creepy to me) to have people come up and yell my name (albeit skate name) but still somewhat cool. And I appreciate all of their good wishes – especially since I have been retired for a few years but still love BERG.
As soon as I saw their signs I knew I had to load these ladies up with swag!
– Having serious talks with Slaughter – and her pausing to sing parts of hip-hop songs.
– Another Cougar moment – at the end of the parade where we always gather to watch (and finally drink) she was trying to trade a rubber chicken for a shoe. “Chicken for a heel?!” She told me that she wasn’t having any luck, and maybe she should quit. Hell no! She kept up and SCORED! She literally did not stop screaming and jumping up and down for ten minutes. What was even more perfect it was right around midnight – her birthday! I was so excited for her. Her smile did not stop for the rest of the night.
Cougar's moment of glory!!
The ladies of Muses were a bit low on their throws by the end of the parade, but I still managed to get some nice stuff. The weirdest stuff I got was a beer, a water, and a very heartfelt offer of an apple from a Muse. “I have nothing to give you. I would give you anything for those boobs. Anything! A koozie? I live uptown, you can come there. How about my apple? It’s the one snack I have but I’ll give it to you. DO YOU WANT MY APPLE?” In the end, I gracefully turned down her sole Granny Smith.
Wonderful, exhausting, challenging, exciting – Muses. My body is recovering, but my heart will remember. To me, it is always the official start to Mardi Gras.
The Big Easy Rollergirls in Muses 2012
Let the wild rumpus begin….! Now, if I can only stop the high squeaky excited voice that comes out during these times. How do I control that? I guess just keep putting myself in those madcap remarkable moments and practice, practice, practice.
Lovely!!!